Well, nice to meet you, Bjergen Kjargen, from Kneurgen, near the Joergen Fjords. Hmm. Kneurgen, that's in the Klargen Province, near the Biburgen River.

I am in Geiranger, Northern Norway and it is a really nice town in a fjord with a population of 300 people (plus a few seals and killer whales). I also have some sort of strand of the Martian death flu and I made the stupidest joke I have made in a while. Someone said that I didn’t look too well and I said I was traveling through Liberia and caught a bit of a cold. No one found it funny and I thought they were going to throw me off the boat.

North Western to Norway is everything I thought it would be. Dark calm waters with  narrow inlets, towering peaks that are stilled snowcapped and some have clouds resting quietly. Endless waterfalls and topless mermaids despite the cold water. Just a visual spectacular.

So now if I don’t die I have two hours to kill before I go onto a bus, kill another few hours and then take an overnight boat to Bergen and then to The Netherlands. The way I feel now I would be quite content to spend a day inside a hotel.

The prices here. From 28 dollar beer to I am not making this up, a 2800 USD cab ride. Thankfully I didn't pay for it. There was a mix up with a train and I was going to miss my boat so the National Railroad of Norway sent me by taxi to Lillihamer and beyond.

what a 28 dollar beer looks like

x .16

13th Century Church

Growing grass of the roof is the thing to do

Sonjafjord

The owners of these houses were encouraged to resettle (similar to Newfoundland)




Gerinrangerfjord

Pretty much how I live my life

Gerinranger

Black is the night, metal we fight

Norway

Good God I am not making this up. I went to a Death Metal/Black Metal Bar last night. I swear by the two vaporous balls of the holy ghosts that this was one of the weirdest things I have been to. I was itching to burn down a church so I thought I would start here. Unbearably loud, ghoulish bands, weird ass audience. As soon as I went in I thought holy feck, I am going to end up on an altar with a goat’s skull for a head dress. Start with Slipknot and Converge and consider them Air Supply. Demonic screams, thrashing heads with long hair, no hair but long beards, fat ass singers, and basic mayhem. If ever there was a place for my skull bracelet this place was it. I was not to be fucked with after they saw  this on my wrist. I stood at the back and hoped to be left along. No one said a word to me but I can’t say I was totally comfortable there.

At times I was dangerously closing to hearing something that resembled music. I thought the place was for  a bunch of fake and phony clowns. But I didn’t say that. It was Devil Horns and fuck this and fuck that for the entire night. 

I did go the Viking Ship Museum, Kon Tiki Museum, Edvard Munch Museum and Museum of National History but at the concert I said museums were for wimp ass accountants.

Tomorrow I had for west Norway which is the main reason for this trip. Time to harpoon me a whale.

Kon Tiki

These are the orginal flag from the Kon Tiki

This is from 830 AD and in remarkable shape

Viking Boat

I was half pissed and thought it nice they named a urinal after me

Munch

Why I am too childish to travel